Response to the You Are 50 Family Video

**** THE LATEST AND FINAL AUDREY VERSION OF MAD WORLD -  WE PROMISE NOT TO REVISE IT ANYMORE. ****

I am deeply touched that my sisters, nieces, nephews, and my mother put their hearts and soul, time and energy to produce a family song and dance video to drive home the point that I have turned fifty years old, marking half a century of being on earth, and of belonging to this will-do-anything-to-make-you-feel-loved family. 

Never mind that they kept reminding me that I am getting there in years -- that is what sisters are for really - to keep one rooted to reality. I can bravely face my imperfections, humanity, and yes, my mortality, because I know that they will always be there for me, cheering me on, embracing me with their love, and encouraging me to be unafraid of challenges. 

The thing is, my sisters took the big, risky step of committing their creativity, singing and dancing skills to eternity in the family archives, to be viewed and analyzed by the current generation and by the many generations to come. Joji, if the video is leaked to the rest of the world, just know that I have nothing to do with it.

My own hysterical reaction to their hard work tells how effectively they have surprised and delighted me. There was only one casualty in this song-and-dance assault - Audrey, my 5-and-3/4 years old daughter. All along, she thought I turned 29 years old this year. Her reasoning? "Because you were 28 years old last year." I did not plant that idea in her head. She just thought that to be accurate and true based on her current age-appropriate understanding of numbers as they relate to the concept of time. I had not bothered to correct her because she was so sure of herself, and can be very dramatic about making mistakes. I thought I could spare her the trauma, but alas...

...The family video jarred her perfect world. That night, as she watched the video, she was horrified. "Why did they say 50? You are 29!" Then, confusion set in. "How old are you really?" I was laughing so hard at what I was witnessing on the TV screen that I could not answer her question. The next morning, both of us, sleep deprived and all, faced that question again. I finally told her the truth. She cried. She felt very disappointed. "Why didn't you tell me the truth?" She asked. It took her a few hours to feel better. To bring closure to this matter, we made a special song for all of us, most especially for Audrey who was affected the most by my turning 50. (Note: We decided to use the song, Mad World, to memorialize our support for Adam Lambert as the next American Idol. FYI, we were not heart broken that Kris won instead. We are OK with the outcome.)

Once again, I thank you, my family, from the bottom of my heart. The video you made was totally unexpected and totally awesome. It truly is THE way to commemorate my milestone, and to remind me that LIFE IS GOOD. I love you all very very very much!

Pajama Band Debut: The Lonely Bull

We dedicate this to one of the world's top Mom and the one and only Guama we know who can still get down and boogie with the Awimbaway Song and Dance Troupe.

Reaction Video

Video of Lynne May's (my mother) reaction to 50th birthday DVD.

Audrey's videos

This is the first published video of many videos that Audrey has made. We hope you enjoy the many characters, including Mr. Remote Control!

Why Reading is Cool!

I can read even if I am little. I am five years old but I am learning to read. Now I can read. It feels really good. Now I can read a book that has a number one (she means the level one I Can Read books). It really is easy. Trust me. If you don't believe me, just go to the library.

- Audrey

It is a joyful and proud moment when one's child is beginning to read on her/his own. From my perspective, Audrey's foray into reading highlights her expanding independence from me as well as our continuing interdependence. It presents new opportunities for her to know more about the world in which she lives, and to be an active participant in it. She can begin accessing information on her own. The ways she can be helpful is also (theoretically) increasing. 

On my end as her parent, this milestone challenges me to find new ways to support her growth and development. At the same time, it is a moment when my hopes fly high - Can I finally be liberated from doing some things for her? Can I now finally truly begin to do some new things with her? Can I now begin to stand back and watch her handle more things on her own and offer guidance and support when needed or sought? Can I now gradually begin to do things I want to do for myself?

I sometimes tell Audrey to read to herself at bedtime while I finish washing the dishes. To her delight, we occasionally choral read or do a dramatic reading of a story together (e.g., taking on characters in the story). Sometimes I ask her to read the tiny prints on bottles and boxes that my aging eyes are no longer able to read without the help of eyeglasses. She asks me what certain words mean as she comes across them on food labels and everywhere else, and how to spell words the conventional way. She reads signs on the roads and keeps herself entertained and useful. "Speed limit 45, Mom." She is beginning to do and make things for herself, like pancakes for breakfast on Saturday morning. I am grateful for good recipes printed on the back of boxes!

She still needs to hold my hand as she falls asleep. I still help her dry off after bathing. She needs her cuddles and tickles. She needs me to educate her about what is safe and not, and why that is so. Audrey needs to try things out for herself and make mistakes, no matter how many times she will do the same thing and make the same mistakes. That is how she learns and grows stronger in mind and heart. She went through the same process while learning to read. Reading feels liberating to new readers and to the adults who had guided them in the process. That is my and Audrey's experience. This is a new partnership, a new chapter in our continuing journey together.

There goes Lynne May and her dramatic proclamations, one might observe. I do speak from my heart. When Melanie started reading on her own at age four, I felt joyful and proud. But the impact of that event on me was different then, simply because I was at a very different stage in my own life as an individual, a mother, a teacher, and a woman. That event took place nine years ago, when I just entered the 40's. Now I am about to mark half a century of being on this planet. The urge to do something substantial, and to define what that can be, is strong. I keep my eyes trained on my children, and always will. As I do that, I also see the world around them and everything that is in it, including my own fingerprints and the empty spaces.

I filmed Audrey making her own blueberry pancakes. This was her third time making pancakes straight from the box. This is not her first time being filmed, talking to her audience, sounding like one of those people on How-To television programs. I know she will be an avid reader just like her sister. I hope she will be a better and more enthusiastic cook than I am. Maybe she will begin making our dinner when she is in first grade.

- LM

For My Mama: Obama Music Video

In our household, there is currently only one registered voter, and of course, it can only be an adult member. Guess who? Anyway, Audrey had no doubt in her mind that the vote should be cast for Obama. Melanie seemed indifferent, but when they had a mock election held at her school, she went for Obama. And Obama did win the mock election. 

Chong Lim is predictably a Republican. He is a free market advocate though he does not support the conservative agenda of the religious right. But there is only one legal vote to cast, and it was cast by an Independent voter, me. I voted for hope that we will see a change in the way we look at this country and the way we look into the future, and made my choice. I did not go gaga over him, though I am moved by his words, his story, and the person that he seems to be. Whatever the outcome of the election, history has been made and was being made. 

I am embedding this video to mark an election that delightfully surprised me, not because a black man won the election, but because I witnessed my mother, sisters, and nieces in Washington state become actively involved in the political process, and be among the millions of voters who got caught in the Obamamania wave for hope and change. Especially my mom. She was awake at 3 a.m. in anticipation of Obama's presidential inauguration, 5.5 hours ahead of schedule. So, Mama, this is for you:

Our Only Family Picture of 2008

We've taken hundreds of pictures this year, and not one was a family picture. Fortunately, we remembered before 2008 ended and before Guama ask us for a new one. Oh, I just realized that this one will not work for Guama because of the picture's orientation. We'll try to take another one before Chinese New Year just for Guama. Say "cheese!"