How important are family traditions? I think traditions help build the character of a family unit and keep a family together. Having some constancy and predictability can keep a family grounded on what is important and serve as an anchor, especially in times of turmoil and challenges. They can help make the family strong. Traditions can serve as a spring board to other family activities that add a few more stitches to family togetherness. I have built a strong case for family traditions. But the real question swimming in my head is, "Does my family, the one Chong Lim and I are raising together, have clear-cut family traditions?"
That is not easy to answer because Chong Lim and I experienced different family traditions while growing up, and when placed together as parents under one home, we tend not to be bound by the traditions with which we grew up. In short, we are neither here nor there. Thank goodness we have children who accept life as they experience it.
But to answer my own question, I will try to generate a list of Lim-Kim Family Traditions:
1. Christmas & New Year Tradition 1: We decorate the house - just a modest effort - striving for simplicity and meaning. Read and/or retell the story of Christmas.
Ever since we moved to our current home, I think we have at least some Christmas decorations. We use the same decorations (mostly ornaments and garlands) and arrange them differently each year. This year, we have a small, fake Christmas tree (14 inches tall). This must be the second tree we have ever bought and decorated. Audrey was so excited to see this small tree. She hugged me and said I was the best mom or something like that. Perhaps, we will start having a small tree every year.
As for the story, I have a book or two on the birth of Jesus. This year, I retold the story of Jesus to Audrey (Melanie was listening from where she was) in my own words.
2. Christmas & New Year Tradition 2: We spend Christmas Eve with a family friend. We also spent New Year's Eve with a family friend when in town.
We often spend Christmas with the Haight's and New Year with the Fang's. We get presents for the kids. We remind our children to keep their opinion about Santa to themselves when in the company of children who believe in Santa.
Audrey seems to associate movie-making as part of our family Christmas tradition. We made three short movies of Audrey's first experience building snow people and dog. Parts 2 and 3 are attached to the blog entry entitled "Warm Holiday Greetings" while Part 1 is posted here. We hope you will enjoy them as much as we enjoy filming and putting them together. I am wondering if this will change once she gets older. Melanie tends to be behind the camera and not in front of it. I enjoy this process and will likely continue doing it. Will hunt for willing subjects and catch unwilling ones by surprise. Ha!
4. Birthday Tradition: We bake a birthday cake from scratch or from the box.
Imagine that - Lynne May baking a cake! Who knew? I also buy one balloon for the birthday child. Teenagers do not necessarily reject the idea of a birthday balloon.
Deep in our hearts, my children and I wish we are physically closer to our immediate relatives. Our teenager seeks a "fun-er" crowd than what we have at home. That is totally understandable. But it is because of my two children's response to the Christmas season this year that made me wonder about the family traditions that we have or do not have. Especially the older one. I wanted to teach Audrey some of the Christmas carols I know. I ended up playing with her more than singing with her. We both had fun though. Melanie is in a school chorus and her involvement in caroling at school has heightened her interest in Christmas songs. So I am hopeful that there will be more singing in years to come. Maybe another Christmas and New Year tradition in the making.
Finally, how about adding another family tradition: Plan to have a plan for the holidays! I like spontaneity, but sometimes having a plan can help some family members look forward to having fun (or not), especially the family member who prefers to be with "fun-er" people. So, we might have a plan of getting out of the house with the family -- but wait, a storm is coming our way. Oh well, I guess we could plan on building a new set of snow people and animals.
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